life is easy, son. it’s just like riding a bike that’s on fire and you’re on fire and everything is on fire and you’re in hell
i use the word fuck so excessively i sometimes forget it’s a swear word
Life tip: bring a book with you everywhere you go
Life pro tip: bring two, in case you finish the first one.
Bigger life pro tip: Bring a kobo/kindle with you everywhere so you have an entire library with you at all times.
Ultimate life pro tip: live in a library and never ever leave.
Supreme life tip: Become a library
things women worry about under patriarchy: rape, domestic violence, access to contraceptives, equal pay
things men worry about under patriarchy: getting called gay, paying for dates, why does the car wash give women $1 off on wednesdays
napping together is my kind of date
pros of having a lot of books:
- people think you’re smart and interesting
- it makes you feel smart and interesting
- there’s always some far off world to escape to at your fingertips
- hella knowledge
cons of having a lot of books:
- not knowing what to read next
- just buying more books to had to the “to read” list
dude i’m gonna frickin hold your hand so hard it’s gonna blow your mind with how hecka rad my affection is
This is how to run a stick of Chapstick
down the black boxes on your scantron
so the grading machine skips the wrong
answers. This is how to honor roll. Hell,
this is how to National Honor Society.
This is being voted “Most Likely to Marry
for Money” or “Talks the Most, Says the
Least” for senior superlatives. This is
stepping around the kids having panic
attacks in the hallway. This is being the
kid having a panic attack in the hallway.
This is making the A with purple moons
stamped under both eyes. We had to try.
This is telling the ACT supervisor you have
ADHD to get extra time. Today, the average
high school student has the same anxiety
levels as the average 1950’s psychiatric
patient. We know the Pythagorean theorem
by heart, but short-circuit when asked
“How are you?” We don’t know. We don’t
know. That wasn’t on the study guide.
We usually know the answer, but rarely